Saturday, April 16, 2011

Happy Birthday Son

today i was talking to my son about his 6th birthday tomorrow .... and the presents we had put away and that there were some from nan and pop, ate and bunso and even ninang over in canada.  and he looked at me with big eyes and asked ,"mum .... will there be a present from m******?"

m****** is his birth mother.  my heart ached ... we can never know the true depths of loss and grief that our children experience in the loss of their birth family.  no matter the circumstances .... they have lost their first family. 

i have no doubt that she will be thinking about her son tomorrow.  wondering where he is and what he is doing.  i pray, dear son, that one day you will be able to hug and kiss her and let her know how much you love her. 

this is for you .... where ever you are.

From God's Arms to My Arms, to Yours -- author unknown

So many wrong decisions in my past, I'm not quite sure
If I can ever hope to trust my judgement anymore.
But lately I've been thinking,
Cause it's all I've had to do.
And in my heart I feel that I should give this child to you.
And maybe, you could tell your baby,
When you love him so, that he's been loved before,
By someone, who delivered your son,
From God's arms, to my arms, to yours.

If you choose to tell him, if he wants to know,
How the one who gave him life could bear to let him go.
Just tell him there were sleepless nights,
I prayed and paced the floors,
And knew the only peace I'd find, was if this child was yours.
And maybe, you could tell your baby,
When you love him so, that he's been loved before,
By someone, who delivered your son,
From God's arms, to my arms, to yours.

This may not be the answer, for another girl like me.
But I'm not on a soapbox, saying how we all should be.
I'm just trusting in my feelings, and I'm trusting God above,
And I'm trusting you can give this baby
Both his mothers' love.
And maybe, you could tell your baby,
When you love him so, that he's been loved before,
By someone, who delivered your son,
From God's arms, to my arms, to yours.

2 comments:

  1. Oh Maggie, your words bring tears to my eyes. There is so much pain and sadness, and yet so much grace and goodness, all bound up together in this precious thing called life. May God give you all the love and wisdom you need each day as these beautiful children grow up, basking in the sunshine (sonshine?) of your love for them.

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  2. That's powerful. What a big heart you have to be thinking of your child's birth mother on his birthday. Certainly her son's birthday won't be an easy day for her. My sister gave a child up for adoption when she was 15 and probably still has a hole in her heart from that experience. Hope your family had a fun birthday celebration.

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